gotta learn how to say NO.

I'm officially a dum-dum.
I might have just gotten out from college and done with Ausmat, but one thing I have not learned just yet is how to just. say. NO.



Say no, nad! Seriously!
If you've already made an appointment with one party,
you DO NOT need to agree to another one that could coincide with the former appointment.




I know I sound like such a weakling. Don't deny it, please, to anyone who's reading this now.
It's awful to not be able to say no! I have always been like this. Since school. And it's a weakness that I'm so ashamed of, so very hate, because you're probably thinking that I get pushed around.
But, I think I'm not? But am i?? CAN anyone answer that question please????




Because I enjoy doing what I do!




In secondary school, I joined 3 clubs. And, yeah, I have problems when the meeting is held on the same day, at the same time. I remember on the odd saturdays where i attend the meetings, and I kind of have to run around from one building to another. Running from 3rd floor to the music room on the first floor, and then to the choir club on the next building, and back to ELS on the 3rd. Ha-bloody-ha, and when there's a formal occassion in the main hall, I had to quickly run backstage after the opening caklempong (a music instrument very much like gamelan), and make a mad dash after changing my clothes to join the choir for the 'in-between.'




I didn't join all that because I feel like I had to,honestly because I wanted too.
But I guess biting more than you can chew is asking too much huh?
Maybe I'm greedy. That's why I keep saying yes, oui, si to all the good things that came my way.
Good things, which, if taken in moderation is okay, but I'm not taking it in moderation!




Like when I promised Nana that I would watch movie with her. But I also agreed to watch movie with my classmates. So in the end I didn't get to watch Jennifer's Body with Nana.. I still feel bad because I promised you. And I broke it. I did want to watch it with you. It was not the movie part that is so important, it's the part where I would spend my time time with you and I didn't that made my regret it so. :'(
Sorry nana... sob sob.




Oh, and last raya. Same case. Agreed to meet my closest friends, and ended up not meeting them because I went out with another crowd. Because I thought I was a wise-ass.
Thought that I could manage both you know?
Like, somehow maybe.. I could have the cake and eat it too.




I'm such a sad excuse for a living human being.






Now, I have to choose. To singapore? Or to Kl?
Which izzit gona be kiddo? Because you know you can't say YES to both of them.
You know you have to dissapoint someone, or else you'll end up dissapointing everyone. Including yourself.





Nad, don't be greedy ok!! Having a fun is better than having no fun at all!